When You're Offended // Tuesday, October 7
Posted: Tuesday, October 7
Verse of the day:
Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. (Colossians 3:13)
Know anyone that gets easily offended? I sure do. I think the topic of ‘being offended’ is so interesting because being offended can be so subjective! Sure, there are things that we should just never do to others because no matter who we are, we’re going to be hurt. Like asking someone who’s not pregnant if they’re expecting. Or lying straight to someone’s face.
But so often, I see people offended for the silliest reasons. Maybe you’ve heard someone get offended and say things like this:
“Did you see the way she looked at me?”
“Did you hear what he said? He MUST have meant he didn’t like me”
“She’s doing that just to make me feel bad”
There are definite times when people have legitimately wronged us. Sometimes, there’s just a simple oversight by our offender. But more often, if we’re honest, the real issue is us. Because of our insecurities, jealousy, or fears we are quick to think that people purposely want to hurt us. The truth is there’s a problem within our own heart that’s sensitive and vulnerable to other people’s actions.
Paul wrote that as the bride of Christ, the way to deal with others is to make allowances when they offend us. Not hold it against them, not cut off the relationship, not to tell everyone and their moms how much they’ve offended us. Instead, give them a free pass, grow thick skin, simply let it go. If we’re honest, a lot of the times we find ourselves offended, it’s over little things that don’t really matter.
In the times that there’s a legitimate offense and it’s not a reaction from our sensitive hearts, Paul lets us know to forgive. Forgiveness means to no longer dwell on the incident, to not bring it up to use against them, and to not let the offense come in between the relationship. Go talk to your offender as soon as you can to restore your relationship, and keep it as private as possible. We have been forgiven by God of so much legitimate wrong. How can we ever hold anyone else to what they’ve done to us?
So, forgive and restore. That’s so important. But that’s not a free pass for those who know they have offended someone. Jesus said in Matthew 5:23-24 that before you worship, go and reconcile with the brother you offended. If there’s someone you know that's been offended by you, whether on accident or on purpose, go and try to restore the relationship. Christ wants his bride unified. Let’s be a church that restores and is not easily offended.
Pastor Joshua Humpa // Special Events Pastor